Microaggressions can be hurtful both
intentionally and unintentionally. It is important for people to think before
they speak and realize that your words can affect the person receiving them. I
have had many experiences where words and actions were harmful and hurting
towards me. When I was taking my core courses in college, I remember an
incident in the bookstore. I heard two females talking about hair and one of
them was trying to get the other to ask me about my hair. Well, I turned around
and the Caucasian girl asked me if all my hair was mine. I responded and said
yes and asked her if she would like to check for tracks (weave) because she
gave me an “are you serious” look. She responded and said no but touched my
hair anyway. She said my hair was silky and straight and I must be mixed. I
told her no I am not and both of my parents are Black. I really took the
conversation offensively and the girl caught on because she seemed apologetic
and walked away but never really apologizing. After the conversation I felt
that since I am African American I cannot have nice hair. I have had several
incidents regarding my hair even when I was in high school, not just by people
outside my race but also those of the same race as me.
This week’s lesson has taught me that
anybody can pass microaggressions intentionally and unintentionally, that is
why it is so important to think before you speak and to treat others the way
you want to be treated. I also learned about the different types of
microaggressions, which I was unaware of. I enjoyed this week!
Hi Tiffany -
ReplyDeleteI remember a time when I had just became a group of center managers with head start where we had 50% African Americans and 50% Caucasian managers. I remember my first trip to Atlanta with everyone, I was feeling really out of place when one Caucasian ladies was asking one of the African American ladies, "Bag or real?" Being new, I was afraid to ask, but finally after 15 minutes decided I really wanted to know what they were talking about. When I asked, the African American lady said that the Caucasian lady wanted to know if each of the ladies she was pointing out had real hair or bag hair. I always felt that she was being a little insensitive, but the African American lady didn't seem to mind. I now wonder if she felt this might have been a type of microaggression after this week's reading. What do you think?
Gena
Hi Tiffany, I really think that people can be so insensitive when it comes to whether a person's hair is real or not, what difference does it make? I like that fact that you responded with asking her if she wanted to check for tracks! That shut her right up! She should have apologized for even touching your hair.Great Post!
ReplyDeleteHi Tiffany,
ReplyDeleteIt's amazing how people's biases gets the best of them. For it to encourage them to ask a stranger, such a personal question leaves me speechless. I have very thick, long and naturally kinky hair. When I permed it, everyone, even Black people always asked was it real, wanted to touch it or my roots, so I can relate your experience of people thinking Black people couldn't have long hair unless they were mixed. Recently, I was sporting a wild style, and a white male at a sports bar approached me and said, how did you get your hair like that 'cause it smells too good to be dirty. I couldn't even get mad because everyone around him laughed and he looked puzzled. I said, I didn't feel like combing my hair today, so I didn't. He said, oh...but you must have washed it because it smells so good. Goes to show some people don't think before they speak. There needs to be a lesson in how to keep you mouth closed before something stupid comes out.
Tabitha